Providing and receiving feedback is an essential skill in both personal and professional relationships. When done well, feedback can help with growth, strengthen teams, and enhance performance. However, if approached poorly, it can lead to misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and a lack of improvement.
Here are some key principles to ensure that feedback is both constructive and beneficial.
The Art of Giving Feedback
Be Specific
When offering feedback, avoid vague statements like “You need to do better” or “Good job.” Instead, focus on specific behaviours or outcomes. For example, say, “Your presentation was clear and engaging, but next time, try to slow down when explaining complex concepts.” Specific feedback gives the recipient a clear understanding of what they did well and what needs improvement.
Focus on Behaviours, Not the Person
To prevent feedback from feeling like a personal attack, concentrate on the actions or results, not the individual. Avoid using phrases like “You’re always disorganised.” Instead, you might say, “In the last project, there were several missed deadlines. Let’s work on improving time management.” This approach keeps the feedback constructive and solutions-focused.
Be Timely
Feedback is most effective when given close to the event. Waiting too long can make the feedback feel less relevant or cause resentment. Aim to give feedback as soon as possible while the event is still fresh in everyone’s mind. This will help ensure the feedback is received with clarity and allows for quicker adjustments.
Balance Positives and Areas for Improvement
A good balance between positive reinforcement and areas for improvement is key. If feedback is overly critical, it may demotivate the person. On the other hand, only focusing on positives might not provide enough guidance for growth. A balanced approach, such as the “feedback sandwich” (positive, constructive feedback, positive), helps maintain morale while still encouraging development.
Encourage a Two-Way Conversation
Feedback should not be a monologue. Encourage the recipient to share their perspective or ask questions. This will promote dialogue, ensuring that they understand the feedback fully and feel involved in the process. It also shows that you are open to their input and fosters a more collaborative atmosphere.
The Art of Receiving Feedback
Stay Open-Minded
Receiving feedback can be difficult, especially when it highlights areas for improvement. However, try to view feedback as an opportunity for growth, not as criticism. Stay open to the possibility that others can see areas for improvement that you may not have noticed.
Avoid Defensiveness
It’s natural to feel defensive when receiving feedback, but responding in this way can prevent you from benefiting from the input. Instead, listen carefully and resist the urge to justify or explain your actions immediately. Take a moment to process what’s being said before responding.
Ask for Clarification
If a point is unclear or seems vague, ask for clarification. This shows you are taking the feedback seriously and are keen to understand how you can improve. For example, you might say, “Can you give me an example of when I could have handled that situation better?”
Separate Emotions from Feedback
Receiving feedback, especially if it’s unexpected or critical, can trigger an emotional response. Take a deep breath and try to separate your emotions from the feedback itself. Remember, feedback is about your actions or results, not your worth as a person.
Use Feedback as a Learning Opportunity
Once you’ve processed the feedback, reflect on how you can apply it. What can you learn from the feedback to improve in the future? Whether the feedback was positive or constructive, it’s an opportunity to grow. Show appreciation for the input, even if it was difficult to hear.
Building a Feedback Culture
In any environment, be it a workplace, team, or even at home, creating a culture where feedback is welcomed and valued is crucial. Encourage regular feedback exchanges and lead by example. When giving feedback, show respect and care for the other person’s development. When receiving it, demonstrate humility and a willingness to improve. Over time, these practices will strengthen relationships and lead to greater success for all involved. If you are looking for help building a culture of feedback, maybe consider a business mentor or executive coach to support you.
